the Christian thing to do, but yet you feel HORRIBLE?
Yep, had one of those this evening. It has a long story attached, but suffice it to say that I was snubbed by someone I consider part of my extended family. It shouldn't really surprise me, being that his parents have only seen his infant son once since his birth in April. But it still hurts.
What bothers me is--how do people call themselves Christians and treat their family members this way? If there was some history of mistreatment or abuse, maybe I'd see it. But there isn't! Yes, there has been some miscommunication and hurt, but aren't we supposed to forgive each other and move on? What about the LOVE? Is that not supposed to come in there somewhere?
I know that this is extremely vague. I just wanted to know if anyone else has had experiences like this. I could have easily left without speaking to him. He probably would have never even known I was there. Maybe I make him uncomfortable because I remind him of the family he is leaving out of his life. But would I be any better than him if I just pretended he didn't exist? Aren't I, as a Christian, supposed to continue to reach out in love and reconciliation? I didn't speak to him to make him uncomfortable. I spoke to him because no matter how many years pass, I'm still gonna love him as my friend and family member.
Did I do the right thing? And do I continue to speak, or just treat him with indifference like he treats me?
Robin, this is BH, in case you're wondering.
4 comments:
I think you did the right thing. Doing the right thing isn't always the easy thing or even the most comfortable thing...that's not how God works, you know.
Last weekend, when I was at my parents' house with my grandmother, we all got pretty picky with each other - you know, the kind of stuff that starts when you spend a wee bit too much "quality time" together. But, there's lots of love there that makes it so easy to love and forgive and move on.
I figured that's who it was. You have to continue to reach out when you see him. That way you know you have done what God expects of you. That's all you can do.
I have had this exact experience and ended up breaking off the relationship. I'll be blunt -- it was my mother and she has yet to meet her grandson. He has been home from China with us for 8 months. I just don't understand how a person can be so cruel.
Of course, I am not suggesting you do this! Any way you can work through it would be better than the way my relationship stands.
I'll add you to my blogroll and find you on twitter as well!
I find that reaching out makes you the better & bigger person. And yes, btdt. Some people, even Robin, think that I am too nice to do what I do...but I keep telling myself that it's the right thing to do (oh great, now I'm quoting Kenny Chesney, lol)...but seriously, it IS the right thing to do! That makes US the better person;)
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